We just completed a study of When the Hurt Runs Deep by Kay Arthur. This book is filled with principles from God’s Word, and with insights that Kay has learned from living through pain in her own life. At the end of the book, she has an appendix called A Few Practical Helps, which I felt was worth passing on. If you don’t have time to read the whole book, maybe you can get a little help from these practical tips which I have summarized.
How do you get through the day and the night that follows when the hurt runs so terribly deep?
1. Make sure you consciously inject, include, acknowledge God in every situation.
In Philippians 4:13, Paul wrote, “I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.” In Thessalonians he told the Christians who were suffering persecution to rejoice always, pray without ceasing, and give thanks in everything. These verses tell us to draw strength from God, take everything to Him, acknowledge that He is in control and working in every situation, and to take joy in Him.
2. Find what lifts your spirits.
Many people recommend journaling during times of deep pain. That is a great idea, if it works for you. You may pour your heart out through poetry or writing songs. Kay Arthur wrote that her greatest help and comfort comes from quietly bathing herself in God’s word, just reading and letting it wash over her. She also is helped by reading biographies of other Christians. For me, I can lose myself in study, reading a passage and looking up words, running references, searching for other verses that relate. Find what works for you and do it.
3. Make sure you give your body what it needs.
Hurt, stress, and anxiety all affect us physically. We need to take good care of our bodies during difficult times. Rest, proper nutrition, exercise, and sunlight are important to our health. It is hard to think clearly or keep together emotionally when you are tired. Getting out of your house to walk in the sunshine. Sunlight triggers your body to lift its mood and secrete the chemicals you need.
4. Resist the tendency to isolate yourself.
As tempting as it might be to close yourself off from everyone else, you can’t stay there and get well. Galatians 6:2 says we are to “bear one another's burdens”. Ecclesiastes 4 tells us that two are better than one because if one falls, the other can help him up, if two lie down together they can keep warm, and two together are stronger. You may have to call someone. Don’t sit and wait and feel sorry for yourself if no one comes to you. Take the necessary steps to get out among people, call someone to share your burden.
5. Master your thoughts, or your thoughts will master you.
2 Corinthians 10:5 tells us to bring every thought captive to the obedience of Jesus Christ. Bring all of your thoughts into line with God’s Word. You are in warfare, and your enemy, the devil, wants to direct your thinking, to fill your thoughts with lies, deceptions, and tormenting thoughts. Refuse to accept his attacks on your mind. Proverbs 23:7 tells us ?For as he things within himself, so he is.” Your emotions are fed by your thoughts. You can master your thought life, but it takes discipline and hard work.
6. Read the Psalms.
Whatever pain and brokenness you have experienced, the Psalms will minister to you. The writers of these songs pour out their deepest heart hurts, their praises, their thanksgivings, their questions, even their anger, through genuine, raw emotions. Reading them is salve to the soul and strength to the spirit.
7. Play music, sing, and (if you can) laugh.
Listen to music that sooths or lifts your spirit. Put on your favorite CD and dance. Sing along, even if you don’t feel like it. Laugh. Even when the hurt runs deep, find a reason to laugh. Read funny stories. Watch a movie that is uplifting and funny. Proverbs 17:22 tells us, “A joyful hear is good medicine”. Laughter releases God-created feel-good chemicals.
8. Hug someone.
Touch is healing. Researchers have found that safe, caring touches are good for the mind, body, and spirit of an individual. Touch reduces stress, boosts immunity, lessens the blues, and eases pain as it stimulates the brain to produce endorphins.
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