My Mother

I have written sometimes about my mother, who is now 97 years old. She is weak and cannot take care of herself, so she is living in a Nursing home. She gets really good care, and the people who work there seem to truly love her. I have a sister who visits her every day, another one who goes about three times a week, and another sister who visits once a week, as I do. All of her needs are met, and she knows that she is loved.

Physically, she is getting weaker. She is confused and forgetful. But, she still has a spark of her old good nature, and, sometimes she is very entertaining.  (you can see post of August 5 for some stories).

She is well taken care of, but kept wanting to move. She did not want to have a room mate, and did not want so many people around. We checked into some other places, and finally moved her into a residential, licensed home that cared for only 8 people. She had her own room, which we decorated for her. She didn't like it. She said that it was too quite, she missed all the people at the other place, and she wanted to move back. Since she was not happy, and because of insurance complications, we moved her right back to the nursing home after a few days.

She is in a new room, with a new room mate, which is a better situation. The people at the home were very glad to have her back and welcomed her back very sweetly.

I visited her right after she moved back. I took her for a walk around the home, as I always do. Everyone we pass speaks to her and she smiles and waves at them. One woman, an employee, hugged Mom as we passed and told her that she was glad she was back. She then told me that mother told her that she had gone to a Casino for a few days, but she lost all of her money and had to come back.  (I'm sure that mother has never been in a casino.)

Mother talks about church a lot. She says that the church they go to now is not much of a church, they just sing a little bit, and no one preaches, they just eat. When we went for a walk, as we got close to the dining room, she said that was the church. OH, no wonder they eat and don't have any preaching!

She is always telling me that she spent the day working at the church. I think it is so sweet that, in her mind, her life revolves around church activities. I guess she thinks she goes to church 3 times a day.

After my dad died in September, she became confused, because his brother had died a few months before. My dad's name was Hoyt, and his brother was Harmon. Mother, after using the wrong name, told my sister, "Well, I'm just going to call him Harmon." And, she has. I cannot understand how she was married to a man for 73 years, called him Hoyt, which is his name, but now, has decided to call him Harmon. I think it is just so funny. But, it is confusing. I visited her in October, and she said, "Well, it has been a month since Harmon died." I started to correct her that it was almost a year, but I realized she was talking about Daddy. I'm never sure who she is talking about.

Last week when I visited, she was afraid, because a woman was threatening her. She said that it was her "dead ex-husband's girlfriend" who was mad because his spirit comes to visit mother a lot.  WHAT! Mother never had an ex-husband, and her husband sure never had a girlfriend. Mother was afraid to stay by herself and wanted me to spend the night with her. Finally, mother's room mate said that she would stay with her that night, and that made it ok.

This Sunday, Les and I went to see her. Les told her room mate that mother was an "Arkansas Hillbilly", something my mom has always been proud of. He then turned to my mother and said, "Hey, were there any moonshiners in Harkey's Valley?" She said that there was one, and he had a path beaten to his place, but, it was different then, they used it for medicine. Then, she said, "Arley (her older brother) and I would taste it sometimes, then we would taste it again, and taste it a little bit more, and, then it would all be gone. We didn't know if anyone was sick or not, but we didn't care."
Les asked if the "revenuers" went after them.  (IRS agents who enforced the law's against making home made liquor, who were called revnuers."  She said, "Yes, the revenuers came, but they kind of like it, too!"